Sale! Shop of 1000 Dreams

[Maigan]

Come one, come all. Limited time only! Your heart's desire at rock bottom prices. Trade in your unrealised hopes for a new dream! Top prices paid. No offer refused. Take advantage of our specials or or simply browse our extensive line of dreams. Terms available to approved buyers. All major cards, payola, inducement and threats accepted.

Specials this week:

Are you tired of your old hopes? For a limited period you can purchase the fully automatic, patented Acme Optimist Kit! Comes complete - no attachments needed! Order now and receive Optimism at no extra cost! It's promising at just 49.99GP. Order now and we'll throw in  a Fresh Start at no extra charge. Be the first on your block to own the new Acme Optimist Kit!

Tired of staying awake all night? Trade in your old anxiety for a box of Acme Sleep Sheep. 1000 per box. Guaranteed so boring that even your neighbours will get drowsy! They're cheap sheep at only 99.99GP per box! And for just an additional 24.99GP you can own the add-on lawn care and garden compost attachments. Put those sheep to work during your waking hours. Another quality Acme product. Additional attachment available through your local hands on retailer (Discount vouchers accepted from all residents of New Zealand, Wales and Pedro)


Tired of it raining on your parade? Want to wash your car and still have that picnic? Get your Insta-matic Silver Lining here. Dont let a dark cloud ruin your day. Find the bright side of life. 74.99GP is all you need! Don't let despair run your life. Simply inflate your silver lining and attach to any desperate situation. Find a rainbow and brighten your day with the all new, guaranteed silver lining (inflate-o-matic 35GP and umbrella-matic 49.99GP - personal shoppers only, no rainchecks). Brought to you by Holiday Rain - 'You can depend on hoiday rain products' guaranteed by Tedium: Holiday Rain and Tedium - what a combination!

Enter our Pot of Gold competition. Buy a Silver Lining and go into the draw for a Pot of Gold! Only available with products bearing the Silver Lining label.

Shoppers - when you need a break you can always find a refreshing change at our Tavern of 1000 Dreams conveniently located nest door.    

[Kothoses the Tyrant]

*wanders in before Erik and Aradia have a chance*


But what about Taters and Hamburger buns?

[Maigan]

No problem Sir. Just go th' Tavern of 1000 Dreams and yer can get whatever yer want t'eat. Our trained staff will be pleased t' serve ya.

Say can I interest ya in some of other specialty items? Like our Hoe +3 (ho ho ho) fer all yer Christmas garden needs.

Or th' set o gift forks? We advise all our customers t' get forked before th' rush.

[Zoras]

Yes, I'd like to purchase your Harem range of nubile slave girls. I believe its item no.s 714 - 809.

What? You're all sold out? Can I take a raincheck? No? How about an Arkenstone? No no, I assure you its the genuine article, not those cheap, Gnome-made replicas.

No, I do NOT want a Pedro's Sheep Special, regardless of how many you're willing to give me.

[Maigan]

Well, sir. We are mainly in the line of buying and selling dreams and desires, but I am willing to take special goods on consignment.

What did you want for the Arkenstone?

[Spelman]

Arkenstone?  Isn't that like, where Fred Flintstone's former president came from?

[Zoras]

Hmm, let me have one of those Succubi serving maids they've been talking about. If there's any value left over, just put it on my account.

[Maigan]

No problem sir. Succubi it is. Say, if yer taking the succubi how about some Acme unlimited energy? I can throw in a 48 hour supply.

And I've put in an order for more of our popular Dream-tel Instant Harems. Should be here anytime now.

[Bex]

maigan, do you have a cure for sick hearts? i need something for a special friend.